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The Pawn

Corrupt a Wish Foundation

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Granted, but they're elitists and socially retarded. But they're nice.

i wish my dick wasnt swollen from slamming it into a bee's nest

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Granted! Your dick is now invulnerable to all and any outside force. You're also impotent and your invulnerable penis is also invulnerable to arousal. 

I wish I'd gotten braces in earlier.

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Granted, now you're a paraplegic due to unforeseen circumstances.

I wish Photoshop wouldn't crash whenever I worked on details


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Granted. You now have infinite wishes, but none of them will ever come true.

 

I wish I was a millionaire.

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Granted. Unfortunately since I'm in charge you won't be no erotic attractive succubus you will be a black evil creature that kills and breaks the world. You lose your conscious and eventually just became a murderrushed fiend - then you will be hunted down by the vatican.

 

i wish i had really large knees that i could use as two sacks to comfortably sit anywhere

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Granted but those sacks are actually cancerous tumors that are inoperable and will claim your life within a month.

 

I wish I had an infinitely refreshing one thousand dollars in my bank account that no authorities or bank would question.

 

 

 

That's not all that great of a punishment btw.

 

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Granted, they're Guyanaese Dollars; enjoy your infinitely refreshing 4 USD

 

I wish paladin RP was better.

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Granted! Paladin RP is better, but since it's so good, everyone flocks to it, forcing the administrators to put a ban on it altogether or something. Nobody can ever RP a paladin again :C

 

I wish every action I did was sponsored by Google.

 

 

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Granted, but now you're under intense scrutiny for what you say or you may lose more than your sponsorship.

I wish that I had the power to control the ELEMENTS THEMSELVES.

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Granted! The darker powers grow jealous of the elements having a sorcerer, and so they summon a terrible spawn of black to kill you. Brand new to these abilities you have been given, you are clawed in the back unknowingly while you tested out your new powers. Pwned lol

 

I wish I could do sick art.

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Yay! You do sick art, but you never recognize yourself as "good." Also, everyone commissions you gross furry art

I wish my neighbor would shut their dog up at 4 am

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Granted, however, all cats in the world bark incessantly now.

I wish I had a  beautiful singing voice...


Though I know that I had, once upon a time, made a statement on the subject matter, I do not wholly remember what it was that I had said regarding this particular issue; however, however! Whatever it was that I may have said in regards to it(the current topic of discussion, I mean.), I know that I stand by my aforementioned statement, without a shadow of doubt, what I said is what I meant and what I am standing by now. Whatever that may have been.

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Granted, you got a sick new voice.

 

But you sound like the opposite gender.

 

I wish I was a mammoth

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Granted, but you're literally extinct

I wish i was green with it


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You are green with it. But people shun you for being a social outcast for smoking weed. Haha, twisted your words. Eventually you lose your girlfriend, your parents hate you for trying less harmful drugs than what society present, and you are left alone. Here you develop an interest for nihilism and misanthrophy. Eventually you start to look at the flaws of humanity rather than anything else and drink yourself to black out stages every night to forget all the idiots that surround you.

 

I wish I could conjure coffee at will.

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Granted... You can conjure coffee... coffee grounds that is! There is no off switch. You drown in coffee grounds in your sleep a day later.

 

I wish I was a sorcerer.


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My Characters (Forum Bios WIP)

Spoiler

=Main Characters=
Aurina Silverfaith - Void Elf Barbarian (Berserker)
'Shade' - Void Elf Rogue
Zaetha - Blood Elf Bit- ... Warlock...

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Granted. You're a sorcerer. While you knoe how to use arcane abilities, all of your casting rolls fail, so nobody believes you when you brag about being a wizred. Also, your Intelligence and wisdom are abysmally low. 

 

I wish my muffin top wasn't so obviously visible.

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Granted, but now you have no meat at all and nobody notices you, you find an old man that dies before you and you get widowed in your thirties. The cycle repeats till you die with 10 ex husbands in their graves.

 

I wish I could find proper rp in a phase thats not hillsBREAD.

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Granted. Instead, you find a rp phase in Gilneas. Everyone roleplays properly, but they all aren't anything more than mediocre.

 

I wish I didn't have to fast before a colonoscopy.

Edited by Ancantatine

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Granted. Now you have to feast until you vomit.

 

I wish Civilization 6 wasn't so bad.


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Granted. There's also no DK RP.

 

I wish DKs knew how to make decent looking sets.


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Granted, but now every Death knight looks exactly the same and they are all like the clone troopers from star wars series.

 

I wish I could have kids.

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